Sitting here pretty bored...was supposed to spend time with Scottland, that didnt happen...he decided to see his girlfriend instead....he makes me sooooo angry when he does things like this but oh well.....i should expect it....I did want to stay home though....ever since i got back from school i haven't really been actively seeking things to do...i just like the feeling of being home because i know how much i will miss it when i go back to the island....I have a dance performance tomorrow and i'm really excited about it...I danced for the first time in a while yesterday and i realized how much i miss it....even though it was jsut tap hahaha....but i really don't think i'll be able to live without it when i go back to school....i wish i wasnt such a practical person and jsut persued dance for my career...hahahaha....yea i know....the medical field will work a lot better in the future...thank god i could sign up for classes next semester....but what happens when i graduate from school and there isnt that outlet for me anymore....oh well....i'll cross that bridge when i come to it.
I helped my brother apply for colleges tonight....Its weird to think that he's going away to school and hes all grown up....I worry about him though...he doesnt do anything on his own...i had to force him to apply and look up summer jobs for him....my mom and i do everything for him and i know thats bad and doesnt teach him how to be a successful person but if we didnt help he wouldnt get anything done....his whole life is sports and video games....thats not good...
Mom's working again tonight...i'm afraid she's stretching herself too thin and these two jobs are tiring her out....she finally has a day off tomorrow but i won't be able to spend time with her because of the performance....when my brother and i are both gone next year shes gonna be so lonely and i dont know how to help her with that....Her boyfriend doesnt help becasue he doesnt have a lot of time for her....mostly she'll be alone and i feel really bad about it....
I saw friends that i havent seen since thanksgiving and thats been great fun....its only been a few so far...but i'm working on seeing more....i went to tea with an old teacher/friend of mine....i love hearing all of the crazy stories she has about the studio and her life....i lvoe her so much and i'm glad we've stayed in touch....i honestly speak to her more than any other person from the studio and even some of my high school friends....hopefully i'll see some at least once before they go back to school....
long post...new blog...should help me vent....til next time :)
